Friday, December 18, 2009


It's quiet here. The menu screen of a movie watched a dozen times cycles through some ethereal song, a camera pans over a snowy hill side. It seems sad as if forgotten, repeating itself over and over again. The dog sleeps or waits for my movement, rhythmic breathing is the only sign she still lives. The coffee grows cold, beckoning me to sip and enjoy before it's too late. I wonder what is going on in the other room. It's so quiet. I hear muffling screams of semi-trunks on the overpass not too far away. A jet flies nearby, crying out in terror. Someone escapes this place on metal wings. Someone is going somewhere, perhaps to meet the love of their life.

I wonder whats going on in the apartment next door or the one down the street. I wonder, in all the world if someone feels like I do, thinks like I do, dreams like I do. I wonder if anyone hurts like me and cries like me. I wonder if anyone is trying to break free, trying to find a better life or if everyone has given up hope.

I wonder what you are doing. Does my image haunt your mind, do my words haunt your soul, can you feel my arms wrap around you, holding you tight? I wonder when we will meet again and what the world will think when they see us together. I wonder if you are real and then I wonder if I am real, as well. Perhaps this is a story. A muse of some god or titan that watches afar pushing buttons to steer our actions, our lives, only for his amusement.

I wonder if God has come and gone. I wonder if he has abandoned us to our fate, stealing heaven from our destiny, leaving only the broiling depths of the abyss in which we will burn. Then I hear your voice over the phone. Sweet, sweet voice, so quiet, nervous but willing. Reality rushes up behind me, striking the back of my neck. But it is divine! Sweet melody of your voice reminds me of truth. You are the voice of God to me. Your honey dipped words are gospel. Suddenly, I believe.


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